


Melted

by Cherry



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Eruri Week, Eruri Week 2015, Fluff, Ice Cream, Innuendo, M/M, silliness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-03
Updated: 2015-08-03
Packaged: 2018-04-12 17:18:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4488057
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cherry/pseuds/Cherry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What is a perfect family, anyway?</p><p>Summer fluff and dodgy innuendo. Levi sells good quality homemade ice cream at a beach cafe. Erwin wants soft whip 99s. With flakes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Melted

**Author's Note:**

> Summer silliness for Eruri Week 2015 - Day 1 prompt: Family.

“Five medium 99s with flakes please,” Mr. Stick-me-on-the-front-of-a-holiday-brochure-with-my-beautiful-wife-and-my-three-beautiful-kids-because-I’m-just-that-fucking-perfect said with the kind of smile that made Levi wish he hadn’t left his only pair of sunglasses on Hange’s kitchen table. The weather forecast hadn’t been promising, but the sun had obviously decided to shine just for this bastard and his TV-ad family. Levi was tempted to ask where they were hiding the camera crew, but he settled for a contemptuous glance and a sweeping gesture that covered all ten of the homemade ice cream varieties he and Hange had spent all weekend making. “The gingersnap is good,” he said. “And the pistachio. Or I can recommend the cinder toffee, if you have a sweet tooth.”

Ad Dad hesitated, repositioning his designer sunglasses on top of his head with a practised gesture that avoided displacing a single strand of that neatly combed golden hair. He gazed at the metal bowls of ice cream in the display freezer and Levi wasn’t at all surprised to see that his eyes were a striking, Hollywood blue.

“Um – they look delicious, but I think we’ll stick with the medium 99s for today,” Mr. _No-Way-My-99-Is-A-Medium_ said firmly, with a fractional drawing together of golden-brown eyebrows that ought to have looked ridiculously too big for his face and yet somehow managed to suit him.

Levi made even less effort than usual to hide his irritation as he grabbed the box of cheap wafer cones from under the counter, stuck one under the nozzle of the soft-whip machine, and swirled the white gloop onto it. “Five reconstituted milk-powder and vegetable oil dollops of ice cream substitute coming up.”

To his annoyance Eyebrows chuckled in a way that caused unwelcome sensations in parts of Levi that were luckily hidden behind the counter.

“And don’t forget the flakes,” was Mr _. You-Can_ - _Bet-My-Flake-Is-Unforgettable_ ’s only comment.

Levi stuck the five already-melting ice creams into the holder on the counter, and added the flakes with deliberate and unnecessary violence at haphazard angles, making sure the last one was pointing at his infuriating customer in a vaguely obscene manner.

“I read somewhere that the perfect angle was forty-five degrees,” Mr _I-Know-You’d-Take-Any-Angle-I-Was-Offering_ said. There was the slightest of hesitations and the suggestion of a raised eyebrow before he added, “For a 99 ice cream, I mean.”

“Well, it’s good to try something out of your comfort zone from time to time...” Levi countered, determined to give as good as he got. He paused for exactly the same length of time Mr. _Perfect Angle_ had done - “When it comes to ice cream, I mean.”

Their eyes met. Levi felt a simultaneous rush of blood to his face and to his groin. Mr. _You-Know-You-Would-So-Why-Pretend-You-Wouldn’t?_ was smiling. “I’ll bear that in mind,” he said in a voice that left Levi feeling like one of the rapidly melting 99s on the counter. “I’ve just moved into town, so I’ll be sure to come by again. Next time I promise I’ll try something different. I like the look of your yoghurt and honey.”

“Tch. That’s what they all –” Levi stopped abruptly, as a golden-haired little girl with wide blue eyes trotted up to the counter and pointed at the row of ice creams. “They’re getting all melty!”

“If it’s too far gone you can have a new one,” Levi told her, genuinely apologetic. “Seven fifty,” he said to the kid’s father, thoroughly ashamed now of being drawn into flirting, refusing to meet the blond bastard’s eyes as he paid.

The whole encounter left Levi feeling weirdly flustered. He wiped down the counter automatically, his eyes straying, in spite of himself, to the area of the beach where the apparently perfect family had set up for the day, a dark-haired older boy helping his little sister spread out a green tartan picnic rug while their mother, model-perfect, somehow managed to look gorgeous eating a melting ice cream while holding an excited toddler on her lap. Did she know that her handsome husband was, at the very least, interested in men as well as women?

Levi scowled to himself as he shoved the box of bland, papery wafers back under the counter, hoping he wouldn’t need them again for a while. What the hell was Blondie playing at, flirting so obviously with a complete stranger right in front of his family? Didn’t he know what he had? How could he gamble the happiness of his wife and kids for the sake of – _What?_ What had all that bullshit been about, anyway? Did he get some kind of sick little kick out of flirting with men he suspected of being gay until he got a response? Was he serious about coming back another time? If he did, would he be alone? And if so…

 _I’ll tell him where to stick his fucking 99_ , Levi thought viciously, and instantly wished that particular thought hadn’t crossed his mind.

The unexpectedly hot weather brought more people to the beach than Levi had been betting on, and the day passed quickly, with good sales of real ice cream as well as processed shit. Between keeping everything clean and serving customers, Levi held imaginary conversations in his head in which he told that good-looking bastard exactly what he thought of him. Unfortunately, those mental scenarios led to others that were much less innocent and far more graphic – _but there’s no harm in_ thinking _about it_ , Levi told himself. _Yeah, he’s hot. Okay, he’s more than that – there’s something about him that… I want. Yeah. In an ideal world, I mean, where he was free, I would want him. No point pretending I wouldn’t. But –_

But there he was, opening a massive picnic hamper like something out of a film – proper plates – even fucking _wine glasses_ – pouring wine for his wife, laughing like he hadn’t just been making suggestive remarks to the guy who ran the beach café… And later, playing football with the two older kids… Showing the tiny one how to build a sand castle…

It had been a long time since he’d thought about it, but Levi found himself wondering whether his own father had ever had a family. His mother had died without telling Levi anything about the man who had left her pregnant with him, and when he’d asked Uncle Ken, who had reluctantly agreed to become his guardian, he’d only laughed. “You wanna know who your father was? Don’t ask me, brat. Should’ve asked your mother while she was still breathing. Ten to one she had no fucking clue who it was, anyhow.”

But maybe there had been a family – unknown half-brothers and sisters who had been taken to the beach somewhere and had ice creams bought for them?

Uncle Ken had only been waiting for an excuse to throw Levi out, and it had come when he’d caught a fourteen-year-old Levi kissing a male school friend. Two months in a children’s home had been enough. Levi had run away, first to a city, then here, to this little seaside resort, where he’d gradually made a life for himself, and found friends – good friends like Hange - who had become much closer to him than the family he’d never really had. Levi wasn’t the kind to dwell on the past or to waste time regretting things that couldn’t be changed, but he did sometimes wish he could remember more about his mother. She had loved him, he was sure of that. If she hadn’t died…

Blond Bastard’s wife was returning from a dip in the sea, beautiful and bronzed, clad in a stylish bikini, looking like something out of a Bond movie. As the tide had come in, the family had moved far enough up the beach that he could sometimes hear snatches of their conversation, and now she called clearly, “Erwin! You should go in – it’s not cold at all!”

 _Erwin_. What kind of a name…? Oh – oh fuck no - now _Erwin_ was stripping off to a pair of ugly blue and white Hawaiian print swimming shorts, and his _chest_ …

Levi made himself look away before someone saw him staring. He served one customer tea when she’d asked for coffee, and almost gave another banana ice cream instead of vanilla, so distracted was he by waiting to see Erwin come out of the sea. He knew it was wrong of him, but however much he disapproved of Erwin’s behaviour, he couldn’t convince himself that it would be a bad idea to add the image of a wet Erwin to his mental store of impossibly attractive men. The reality was even better than the picture his imagination had painted. Erwin emerged from the ocean combing one hand through his wet hair to push it back out of his eyes, his perfect skin glistening, muscles even more defined by the sheen of the water – Levi blinked to stop the disorienting sensation that the world had just gone into slow motion. Erwin picked up a towel. Levi swallowed. Erwin dried himself with rough, vigorous strokes. Levi reached out for the box of peppermint teabags at a customer’s request, eyes still on Erwin, and burned his hand on the urn.

“Ow, shi – uh – sorry – I won’t be a minute!” He turned away to run his hand under the cold tap at the back of the kitchen, and when he returned Erwin was standing there, shirtless and smiling, just behind the customer who was still waiting for her tea.

When the woman had gone, Erwin stepped up to the counter. Levi frowned at him. “Yeah?”

“Um, a tea and a coffee, please.”

“Milk and sugar?”

“Just milk in the tea. Black coffee. No sugars.”

“Right.”

Levi turned away to make the drinks. When he put them on the counter Erwin was watching him with a thoughtful expression on his too-handsome face. “Have I offended you, Levi?”

Levi scowled. “How do you know my name?”

“It’s written on the sign over the door – _Levi’s_. And on your name badge.”

“Oh. Yeah.”

“I hope I haven’t offended you,” Erwin pressed earnestly.

“Me? No.” Levi looked over at Erwin’s family. “Cute kids.”

“Yes, they are. Oh! Oh, I… I see. I – admire a man of principle. But tell me, Levi, what do you see when you look at us?”

Levi shrugged. “A perfect family? Something worth having. Worth keeping.”

“I see. And you never stop to think that things might not be quite what they seem?”

“Geez! I sell ice cream, not marriage guidance! I don’t want to know about your problems. But you shouldn’t –”

“What?”

“Nothing. Never mind. Have the drinks on the house. Just – go.”

“All right. Thank you. It was good to meet you, Levi.”

Levi watched Erwin go back to his family. He handed the coffee to his wife, who took it, smiling. The children were all working together, digging a hole by the sea’s edge, squealing every time a wave came far enough to fill it with water.

It was sometime later, when the tide was on the turn again, and the afternoon was on the point of becoming evening, that Levi’s attention was caught by a man, unremarkable but for his rather scraggy beard and the fact that he was the only person on the beach wearing a suit, making his way across the sand in the direction of Erwin’s family. The little blond girl looked up. “Daddy!”

Levi wondered if he’d misheard, but no – the girl - and the boy, who certainly had a look of this new arrival, now that Levi thought about it - ran towards their father. The girl hugged him. He ruffled the boy’s hair. When he reached the picnic rug he bent to kiss the woman Levi had spent the whole day thinking of as Erwin’s wife, and took the toddler in his arms.

Erwin looked across at Levi and waved. Levi flipped him the bird, but he couldn’t help smiling while he did it, which rather ruined the effect.

Levi returned to work, preparing to shut up shop for the day. He’d already put the _closed_ sign on the door, but he wasn’t all that surprised when Erwin turned up at the counter anyway.

“Any of that yoghurt and honey left?” Erwin asked, looking far too smug for Levi’s liking, “Or will you think I’m a complete pig having two ice creams in one day?”

“Tch. The first one doesn’t even count as ice cream. So, yeah, you can try some.” Levi took a clean scoop from a drawer in the kitchen and reopened the box of good quality waffle cones he used for the real ice cream. “So – the lucky guy with the beautiful family?”

“Is Nile. A good friend of mine from our college days. His wife, Marie, was at the same university – that’s how we all met. The family is staying with me for a couple of weeks now I have a house down here. Marie drove the kids down yesterday – Nile caught the train after work this afternoon.”

“You could’ve fucking told me! I’ve spent the whole day thinking bad things about you.”

“I see... Not all _bad_ bad things I hope?”

Levi’s smile was only a little reluctant. “Huh. No. Some of them were pretty good bad things.”

“I’m glad to hear that. I look forward to hearing about them in more detail… Can I have two scoops?”

“Pig.” But Levi served him two generous scoops of creamy yoghurt and honey ice cream regardless.

The look on Erwin’s face when he swallowed the first mouthful made everything Levi had suffered that day worthwhile.


End file.
